The people who first touched our lives with mercy are usually our parents. Maybe we have been putting off that call, maybe we are tired, maybe there are old hurts between us. On this matter the Qur'an speaks both gently and clearly: it places worship of the One who created us right beside kindness to the ones who raised us. This is not an accusation; it is a heartfelt reminder and a warm invitation. Let us read the relevant verses together.
What does the Qur'an say?
Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you be kind to parents. If one or both of them reach old age with you, do not even say "Ugh!" to them, do not scold them, and speak to them gracious words. (17:23)
And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy, and say: "My Lord! Have mercy on them, just as they cherished (and raised) me when I was little." (17:24)
We have enjoined upon the human being (kindness) to his parents. His mother bore him in hardship upon hardship, and his weaning takes two years. (So We commanded): "Be grateful to Me and to your parents." To Me is the return. (31:14)
We have enjoined upon the human being kindness to his parents. His mother bore him with hardship and delivered him with hardship... Until, when he reaches maturity and reaches forty years, he says: "My Lord! Enable me to be grateful for the favor You have bestowed upon me and upon my parents, and to do righteous deeds that please You." (46:15)
Key word / root
The word ihsan (إحسان), used in 17:23 and 46:15, means "goodness done in the most beautiful, heartfelt way" — not merely doing one's duty, but doing it with excellence. In 31:14 and 46:15 the concept of shukr (شكر, gratitude) comes forward: gratitude to God and gratitude to parents are mentioned in the same breath. This linkage is visible at the level of the text itself.
What do we learn?
Interpretation: A few meanings emerge from these verses. First, kindness to parents is not a casual piece of advice but a weighty command mentioned alongside the call to monotheism (17:23). Second, the real test comes when they grow weak and old: even the slightest hurtful word ("ugh") is forbidden (17:23). Third, the standard is not dry respect but "lowering the wing of mercy" and praying for them (17:24). Fourth, by recalling the mother's burden, the verses show why this kindness is so deserved (31:14, 46:15). These are meanings drawn from the text of the verses; how they apply to particular situations belongs to the realm of interpretation and reasoned judgment.
An honest boundary
Certain at the level of the text: God commands kindness (ihsan) to parents, forbids hurtful speech and scolding, and asks for gracious words and prayer (17:23-24). At the level of interpretation: details such as "which behavior counts as kindness in which situation" and how to set boundaries in family disputes are not enumerated one by one in the text of these four verses; these require fiqh/ethical evaluation and reasoned judgment. Also, while these verses command kindness to parents, other verses preserve that worship is for God alone; so kindness does not mean obedience in associating partners with God or in wrongdoing. We offer this only as an honest boundary reminder, not as a claim resting on verses outside this article's bank.
Conclusion: These verses of the Qur'an can be read not as a list of debts but as a call that softens the heart. Perhaps there is a small step to take today: a phone call, a gentle word, a quiet prayer. The supplication "My Lord, have mercy on them just as they raised me when I was little" (17:24) does good both to them and to us. Would it not be beautiful to listen to this warm call together?
Source: Qur'anic verses (M. Okuyan meal). Presented with a text/interpretation distinction; not a fiqh fatwa.